BarbaWire, April 16

Song of the Day: "Combat Baby" by Metric

Jack's Lover
Condoleeza Rice, former secretary of state during the Bush administration, is headed to prime time. Tina Fey said that Condie will crash my beloved 30 Rock before the end of the season and will play an old flame of John Francis Donaghy. Jack hinted in the first season that he was seeing a “high-ranking African-American member of the Bush administration.” I don’t know how I feel about this. It could be awesome like the time Janet Reno showed up on Saturday Night Live. Or it could suck. More.

Santo Dios!
Catholic women live in the modern world. Who knew? More.

Birther Bill and Stumping in Chicago
The Arizona legislature has passed a bill that would require presidential candidates to prove they are U.S. citizens before getting their name on a ballot in the state. The so-called birther bill says that a certificate of live birth – otherwise known as a legal document that is issued by the state – is not good enough. If you can’t find your original certificate, your certificate of live birth can be backed up by other documents such as your circumcision certificate. You get a certificate for that? More.
Meanwhile, President Obama joked about the birthers while fundraising for his 2012 reelection in Chicago. He also poked fun at Chicago Mayor-elect Rahm Emanuel’s temper and gimp finger. More.
CBS Radio News also picked up some private conversations President Obama had at the fundraising events. It is not particularly juicy, but it is always interesting to see what he says off the script. More.

Giffords' Recovery
Newsweek has a great story about the reality of Congresswoman Gabrielle Giffords’ long road to recovery. While she is improving tremendously, she is recovering from a gunshot to the head. While there are reports that she is already working on her reelection, her husband said that right now recovery is paramount. More.

Crybaby
A kindergartener has been suspended for crying too much. This is ridiculous. I am guessing the appropriate way of handling this would have been to call the child’s parents and tell them to come get their kid, not suspend the poor boy. More.
Funny story time: In the first grade, one of my classmates peed his pants and was able to go home. To a six-year-old, that’s the equivalent of a cougar finding the fountain of youth. You could go home for just peeing in your pants? No way! So, a few weeks later I remember being so bored and antsy that I made up my mind and did it. I peed my pants purposely so I could go home. My mom is still furious.